Five things motorists want to say to cyclists

After putting together my post a few weeks ago about what cyclists would like to tell motorists, I've been getting a few (unsolicited) comments about what motorists would like to say.  It seems that folks in cars are not without their own views regarding the interactions between motorist and cyclist, so I deliberately went about soliciting these opinions.  5 things drivers want to say to bikers after the jump...and, do feel free to add your own in the comments section.

1) PLEASE OBEY THE LAW

Not everyone knows bike law, but we know injustice and danger when we see it.  Blowing through stop signs, riding in between lanes of traffic and ignoring traffic lights are legally ambiguous (in the minds of many motorists - all illegal, by the way) when applied to a cyclist, but we know for certain that it is unfair that smaller vehicles (bikes) engage in such behavior regularly.  Beyond justice and fairness, breaking the law almost ALWAYS increases the danger for cyclists, which leads to the next comment from drivers...

2) I AM TERRIFIED OF HITTING YOU

For your edification

Of course cyclists don't want to get into a wreck with a car.  7000 lb suburban vs. 160 lb cyclist = 43 dead cyclists.  One thing missing from the equation, however, is the human factor.  Motorists don't want to kill cyclists.  It's true.  Sure, make jokes about it, create imaginary scoring systems (2 points for the one in red!),  even fantasize about turning the cyclist-who-cut-you-off-then-greeted-you-with-a-rude-gesture into a grease spot - but at the end of the day, hardly anyone wants to be responsible for hurting/maiming another human being in real life.
To that effect, drivers will do everything they can to avoid an accident.  The problem is, cyclists are often unpredictable.  They don't have tail lights or blinkers, they hardly ever use the proper hand motions, and let's face it, if they did, would we know what they meant?

3) YOU MAKE US FEEL GUILTY
I was actually surprised to hear this one from a colleague, and further surprised to have it confirmed by a few others.  Apparently, many drivers see cyclists as doing something they feel they ought to be doing.  The American problems of obesity, congestion, pollution and so on, are fixable.  All it takes is a little commitment.  When we see others who have made some effort to move our nation in the right direction while we ourselves have remained stagnant, of course there's a little bit of guilt involved.
There are times when I'll find myself watching a movie with my family (Friday nights are movie nights in our house), and there will be family doing something creative, interesting, service-oriented, etc., and here I am sitting on my couch when my kids could be having those experiences.  It's in those moments that I feel a bit guilty myself, wondering if our family is missing out on something.  It appears that drivers go through similar crises of conscience.  I'm thinking about the times I've been sitting in my car, in traffic, eating a BigMac, and then the lean figure of a cyclist buzzes by me, iron legs pumping with power and precision as the bike beneath sways back and forth in perfect harmony...I take another bite and wipe the ketchup from my tie - yeah, you know the feeling.


4) WHY AREN'T YOU ON THE SIDEWALK, ANYWAY?
I can't tell you the number of times (or ways) I've had to field the simple request that I ride on the sidewalk.  Everything from concerned pedestrians commenting at a stop light, "Isn't it safer on the sidewalk," to irate motorists hollering out of windows, "GET THE &%$* OUT OF THE ROAD!!"
Two things:
a) Sidewalks are a terrible place to ride.  They're cracked, curvy, uneven, and very often covered in debris such as  sticks, grass clippings, rocks and parked cars. Yes, parked cars.  During my 1.5 mile walk to and from church on Easter Sunday, I counted 12 times that I needed to walk around a car that was blocking the sidewalk.  If that statistic stayed consistent, I'd have to ride into the street 192 times on my 24 mile commute.  I may as well stay in the street if that's the case!
b) Many cities have speed limits for sidewalks.  As they should.  Sidewalks are primarily for pedestrians, who typically move at around 3-4 miles per hour.  If a bicycle is moving at 20 mph, a walker might as well be standing still.  I'm far more likely to end up hitting a stationary object (that tends to freak out when it sees me) than a car in the road is likely to hit me.

5) I HAVE NO IDEA WHY YOU'RE DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING

For many motorists, cyclists fit neatly into one of two categories: Lance Armstrong and poor people.  Put another way: those who CHOOSE to bike and those who HAVE to bike.  Some choose to bike for exercise or for the environment, while others bike because of economic circumstances.  The thing is, the world of cyclists isn't quite so cut-and-dry.

Drivers can hardly be (and would likely be offended if they were) classified into categories (judged) based on their choice of automobile.  What's that?  You drive a BMW?  You must be a middle-aged man of moderate success who is disappointed with where your life is headed and so have purchased a vehicle you think gives you status but really says that you couldn't afford a Mercedes.  HMMMm?  A minivan?  Don't forget to bring the kids to soccer practice this afternoon, mom!  IS THAT A HUMMER??  Probably not a poet. Just sayin'.

The fact is, there are as many reasons for cycling as there are cyclists.  In fact, I still haven't figured out why I'm cycling, and would hate to learn that I'm judged one way or another based solely upon my mode of transportation.  I am more than a bike.  Thank you.

What do you think?  Is there something you've wanted to say to a cyclists but didn't have the chance? Comment!